Why Estate Planning is Essential for Supporting Your “Chosen Family"

by Jenny Ling, Esq.

In today's world, family dynamics are constantly evolving. While many people only think of families as consisting of parents and children related by blood or marriage, we know so many people now have chosen families made up of close friends or non-relatives. Chosen families can be just as or even more important and meaningful as our families of origin, and it is crucial to ensure that they are supported and protected in the event of your passing. Estate planning is a powerful tool for ensuring that your chosen family is taken care of after you are gone.

Estate planning is governed by state law and those laws do not recognize your chosen family as the default persons for making medical decisions for you in the event of incapacity, nor do they recognize your chosen family to inherit from you.   When you die or if you become incapacitated, your chosen family would be at the mercy of the choices of your legal family – parents, siblings, or adult children.

Getting your estate plan in order puts you in the driver’s seat to tell your family and loved ones your wishes should you become incapacitated or when you pass away.

Here are some ways in which estate planning can help support your chosen family:

Naming beneficiaries: When creating a will or trust, you can name beneficiaries who are not legal relatives, such as a close friend or a domestic partner. This ensures that your assets will go to those who you consider to be family, rather than being distributed based solely on legal relations.  If you do not make a plan and have pass away, your assets will be distributed via intestacy – first to your children, then to your parents (if living), then to siblings, and then, if necessary, to even more distant relatives.

Designating guardians: If you have minor children, you can designate a guardian to take care of them if something were to happen to you. This is also an important step if you have chosen family members who you consider to be your family, and you want to ensure that they are able to continue to care for your children.

If you die without making a plan for your children, a judge will decide who should be guardian of your children.  Anyone who is willing to be guardian will be considered.  The judge will not know the reasons you have for wanting one person over another.  They will pick a guardian for your children based on who can make the best case and may give priority to your legal family, as opposed to the family you have chosen.

There may be people in your life that you are certain should not help raise your children if something happens to you.  Make your wishes clear in a legally binding document so that you are the one making that decision, not a judge.

Health care proxies: You can designate a trusted friend or relative to make medical decisions on your behalf if you are unable to do so. This is particularly important if you have a chosen family member who you trust to make decisions that align with your values and wishes.

If you become incapacitated and don't have a comprehensive estate plan in place, a court will appoint a guardian to manage your affairs. This process can be time-consuming, expensive, and stressful for your loved ones and may result in someone you wouldn’t choose making decisions for you.

Power of attorney: Similarly, you can designate a chosen family member to make financial decisions on your behalf if you are unable to do so. This is important for ensuring that your finances are managed in a way that aligns with your wishes and values.

Estate planning is an essential tool for ensuring that your chosen family is supported and protected when you die or if you become incapacitated.  Everyone, no matter what stage of life they are at, should have an estate plan in place.  It is important to let your family, both birth family as well as chosen family, know what your wishes are. By creating a comprehensive estate plan, you ensure that your chosen family is taken care of.  Do not wait until it's too late – Contact Us to start estate planning today to ensure that your loved ones are supported in the way that you intend.

Jenny Ling is a partner at the Law Offices of Jenny Ling, PLLC.  She focuses her practices on estate planning, business succession planning, business and bankruptcy.